Cougar's wife

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Rali'vinee
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Rali'vinee » Sat Dec 22, 2018 12:33 am

Dear Cougar,
Of all that I've missed in the years I've been gone from CoPAP, my biggest regret is not having seen this thread to know what you've been going through and fighting for. You and your wife are now solidly in my prayers and heart and I send you all of the healing power I can.
Love, me.

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Ambrosia » Sat Dec 22, 2018 1:05 am

Thank you for letting us know and for the update and know that you are most definitely on our prayer list as well.
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by GunnJ » Sat Dec 22, 2018 1:07 am

You both are so strong, I wish and pray the best for the both of you.

One thing I discovered while traveling with someone in a wheelchair is to get TSA's Pre-Check. Oh. My. Word. That was worth the price, every single penny.

Hugs for you both. :)
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Gorgon » Sat Dec 22, 2018 1:12 am

I never was good at posting personal things (probably why you don't see me do it often, outside of rave stuff). That being said...

Please know that you are in our thoughts here, and we are wishing the best for both of you.
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Cougar » Tue Feb 12, 2019 12:06 am

Update concerning my wife -
We just had another PET scan done on the previous last Friday (Feb 1st) and met with the oncologist Wednesday afternoon. It nearly broke me to hear her cancer is spreading. Thankfully it has not taken any foothold out side of her bone marrow but it has spread drastically through her bones. It was previously located to her pelvic, parts of her spine, and breast bone. It is now nearly her whole spine, shoulder blades, and in both arms and legs. We now are treading into an area of how much her bones can take so she is going to have to be x-rayed numerous times for bone density. If any area is weak it will need to be radiated locally and then pins, plates, or other artificial support put in keep breaks from happening. And only if her blood numbers bounce back up, currently they are extremely low, she will then start a new chemo in three weeks that is extremely harsh. At a regiment of once ever three weeks.

Our son just celebrated his 17th birthday and is on track to graduate high school next year. The doctor could not give us good odds of her making it that long. I can only pray she will respond well to this treatment otherwise I am not sure how to explain this to our son.

As always we appreciate all the kind words and prayers given.


God bless and thank you,
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Katroine » Tue Feb 12, 2019 12:31 am

Sending you all the strength and love to get through this. I've been thinking about you and hoping you've been doing okay. If you ever want to talk, hit me up.

XOXO
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Cameron Klym » Tue Feb 12, 2019 11:50 pm

Praying that your wife can start to get on the upswing ASAP.
Would any amounts of vitamin D help at all for her bone density?

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Rali'vinee » Fri Feb 15, 2019 12:45 am

Continuing to send love and blessings to you and your wife, Cougar.
I am praying for this treatment to work.

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Kanos » Fri Feb 15, 2019 1:49 am

Sending hope and good thoughts your way.
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Cougar » Tue Feb 19, 2019 4:34 am

Update concerning my wife -

We just had another PET scan done on Friday February 1 and met with the oncologist the afternoon of the 6th. It nearly broke me to here her cancer is spreading. Thankfully it has not taken any foothold out side of her bone marrow but it has spread drastically through her bones. It was previously located to her pelvic, parts of her spine, and breast bone (a mere 8% of her skeletal structure). It is now nearly her whole spine, shoulder blades, and in both arms and legs (85% of her bones are cancer infected). We now are treading into an area of how much her bones can take so she is going to have to be x-rayed numerous times for bone density. If any area is weak it will need to be radiated locally and then pins, plates, or other artificial support put in keep breaks from happening. And only if her blood numbers bounce back up, currently they are extremely low, she will then start a new chemo in three weeks that is extremely harsh. At a regiment of once ever three weeks.

Our son just celebrated his 17th birthday and is on track to graduate high school next year. The doctor could not give us good odds of her making it that long. I can only pray she will respond well to this treatment otherwise I am not sure how to explain this to our son.

As always we appreciate all the kind words and prayers given. I also wish to apologize in advance if I am not my normal cheerful self and take time before responding to any messages.


God bless and thank you
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by LadyAwesome » Tue Feb 19, 2019 4:46 am

Cougar I am so sorry you have to go through all this. I watched my friend's dad go through something similar and it was horrific. Your son is luckily old enough to understand. I am thinking on your family and wish you all the love and support I can muster XX.
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Cougar » Thu Sep 05, 2019 5:06 am

Final Update:

Back on May 17th my wife fell when attempting to get in the shower. It took me four hours after we got her back to the bedroom before she would let me call paramedics to get her in to a sitting position (we have a full automatic standing chair.) She declined going to the hospital then. She was not getting better over the weekend and it was five days later I was finally able to get her to understand we had to go in. Once in the hospital I did not want to admit it but I knew she had something wrong. The doctors confirmed my worse fears the cancer was now not allowing her own bones to withstand her weight. She demanded to go home and the only way they would allow it was if she went on Hospice. I filled out all the paperwork as and on June 1st she came home and we made our living room her new medical area. With a heavy heart I regret to say on June 14th she passed away surrounded by family. The last six weeks of her life I was off work without pay and I do not regret it at all. We got to catch up on so many talks and discussions we never had the time to do. I have done a great many difficult things in my life but that was by far the most hardest I have ever done. Seeing cancer change her personality as it went to her brain was the most shocking. I know it was not her yelling at me but it still hurt a lot. I am so thankful her mother was with us through this time and her family all came over once I told them she was going to pass.

Enough time has passed I can now write this without tears blocking my vision. I apologize for not getting this done sooner but I needed time. Now is the even harder part of putting my life and our son's back together to move forward. I do plan on coming back to play as time permits and I know I have not kept up on the forum let alone all the changes that have happened but I look forward to seeing everyone again.

God bless you all and thank you for all the support over the years.

RIP Jayne M Swearingin
04/20/1961 to 06/14/2019
Obituary
Last edited by Cougar on Thu Sep 05, 2019 2:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Trigger » Thu Sep 05, 2019 8:48 am

I'm so sorry to hear this, my condolences to you and all your family.

David.

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by silverfields2 » Thu Sep 05, 2019 12:03 pm

I share your grief and send you and your family my warmest thoughts and prayers.

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Zerub » Thu Sep 05, 2019 12:19 pm

I am sorry to hear that. I really don't even know what to say other than I will keep you in prayer. God can do a lot of things.

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Katroine » Thu Sep 05, 2019 12:52 pm

I am so sorry for your loss. My heart breaks reading your words. I am glad you got to be there with her at the end with family around you both. I will keep you and your son in my thoughts. My virtual door is always open if you want to talk, too.
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Eef » Thu Sep 05, 2019 1:21 pm

I am so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you and your son.

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Plethora » Fri Sep 06, 2019 12:12 am

Condolences on your loss

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Cameron Klym » Fri Sep 06, 2019 4:35 pm

Very sorry for your loss and my condolences.

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Auriane » Sat Sep 07, 2019 12:20 am

thank you for sharing those final moments.. it's as if she is with us all.. My heart is with you at this time with much love and hugs

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Hamlet » Sun Sep 08, 2019 4:27 pm

I do plan on coming back to play as time permits and I know I have not kept up on the forum let alone all the changes that have happened but I look forward to seeing everyone again.
One thing that hasn't changed: We are here for you. Avlis is a community, whether we are pushing pixels in game or catching up on Discord chat, or even in person. Stop by anytime.

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Primal Lotus » Mon Sep 09, 2019 3:54 pm

So sorry to hear of your loss. My prayers go out to you and your son.

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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by LadyAwesome » Tue Sep 10, 2019 9:03 pm

I am glad she is at peace now. I hope we soon live in a world where people are not permitted to suffer such pain for that long.

You are a strong man with the love of the people around him. Time heals but you never forget and you know you did whatever you could to make her life better.
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by Darkfire » Wed Sep 11, 2019 2:36 am

I'm really sorry to hear that man. There's no words that will make up for it. Take what peace you can knowing that she's not suffering anymore.
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Re: Cougar's wife

Post by galen_macbyrne » Wed Sep 11, 2019 5:21 am

May her memory be a blessing.

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